Spirit Week 2022: Dodgeball Power Rankings

Spirit Week (October 11-14) has kicked off. One of the most prominent events during Spirit Week is the dodgeball tournament — where the athletes of OP show their competitive nature in a school sanctioned tournament. Along with the tournament comes the notorious Dodgeball Power Rankings. Here are our picks for the 2022 Tourney:

 

1. Buzz Boyz:

Led by Jackson “Cream Puff” Destefano, this team of middle schoolers is the heavy favorite to take the dodgeball crown. These fearless warriors are well prepared for battle, as they are led by Middle School soccer coach, Sir Manna. Don’t be surprised when they win it all.

 

2. Mufasa’s Lechuga:

Led by members of the infamous “Stinky Clan”, this team is looking to go bar down and win it all. Every game they play is going to be a barnburner so get ready because this team has the hardest bracket in the tourney. However, the talent on this team is unmatched, with players such as Dylan “Big Mac” MacNaughton, Ronan “Stinky Monks” Davis, and Seamus “Stinky Bus” Vail. While they have a tough bracket, you can never count out Mufasa and his lechuga.

3. Below Average Joes:

Coming it at number 3, the Below Average Joes want to avenge their loss from last year, and take the dodgeball crown. This team has a variety of Op varsity players – word on the street is that Alabama scouts will be in attendance so everyone knows that Greco will be trying harder than Lebron James in Game 7 of the NBA finals. I would say this is a dream team but Dante Iannitelli is suiting up so there is always a risk of collapse at any moment . However, the whole Catholic Church is behind them with the addition of Father Matthew Dooley to the squad.

 

4. Hugh’s Hefty Henchmen

Mr. Hughes + Michael “Spiderman” Buonaiuto. Need I say more?

 

5. Room 208:

Mr. McCrystal and Michael “The Dump-truck” Kupetz, pair up to make a nearly unbeatable duo. I would not want to run into this team, especially when considering they also have the renowned Ben Warga.  This senior team will try to climb to the Dodgeball Mountain Top, as it will be the last chance they get. 

 

6. The Cult of Manna

Although they are lacking the presence of Mr. Manna, this team of seniors will be hard to take down, especially with the addition of Mr. Gordon (Religion). Let’s just hope Kieran Bergin is better at dodgeball then he is at the joke of the day!

 

7. The Academic Weapons: 

This team sits in the front row of a 700 person lecture, they truly are academic weapons. Led by a staggering number of Sophomore Varsity Athletes  (including stud back-up goalie George Fagan) they will be tough to beat. 

 

8. Los Pollos Hermanos:

Gustavo Fring and Tremayne “The Lean Demon” Quarrie lead this team of sophomores, who want to make a run at the dodgeball crown. Have fun trying to hit Tremayne as he will lean so low, he will be impossible to hit. With JV Baseball stars Trevor Williams and Austin Knight also on the roster, these sophomores are primed to make a run.

 

9. Lean’s Demons:

This team of seniors is led by Joe Anthony, Emile Curi and Luke Donovan but is named after Tremayne “The Lean Demon”. Combine these players with the name, “demons” and it is no surprise why this team wants all the smoke when coming to the dodgeball courts. 

 

10. For Coolio:

The only thing that has greater numbers than their fire power, is the number of Charlie’s they have. Led by the Fantastic 4 of Charlie Magistro, Charlie Saunders, Charlie Sokol and ex-cross country runner turned school work enthusiast Charlie Kline, this team could pull some upsets.

 

11. The Mean Dean Machines

This team of juniors is as dangerous as their name implies. Led by Dean “Juneya” Webber and a variety of other 11th graders, the Mean Dean Machines are a dangerous team that should not be messed with.

 

12. The 7th See’s

Mr. Seebode is on this team, what more could you want? 

 

13. Aki’s Minions: 

This freshman team is looking to make some noise in their first OP tourney. The tall stature of Brandon Lissade makes him a man amongst boys on this team, although it also makes him a large target. However – many believe that Finn Olohan will rally his guys as they hope to make a run deep into the tournament. 

 

14. The Funny HaHa’s:

True to the name, Ahadu Kebede always provides a little “Haha”.  Although this team only has 6 players, Elijah Pagan plays with the strength of 1,000. This is why this team should not be underestimated.

 

15. Yeager’s Disciples:

This team of freshmen has quite the amount of younger brother’s, who are looking to overtake their older siblings. Derek Zapata, Jeremy Yeager, Lucas Costa, Connor Odendahl and Devon Fernandez are all looking to take over their family names here at Oratory. 

 

16. Leftovers:

Gavin Kimble and Kanayo Iwelumo put this team on the verge of greatness. If they can keep the Dorito dust off their fingers, they have the potential for a deep run. 

 

17. Derrick Logan:

Although we do not know much about Derrick Logan, if he is good enough to have a team named after him, we’re sure he can throw a dodgeball. 

 

18. Tortilla

A full freshman squad + one-seventh grader, this team is led by a pair of twins and has Marco Buonaiuto – who is related to the world-famous Michael “Gargamel” Buonaiuto. This team will hope to use their connection to Michael to make a name for themselves. 

 

19. Fake Handsome

This team lives up to its name because if you look at this lineup, you see multiple fake handsome men – which is why they appear last on our list. However this team provides a variety of questions like: can Sacarmel use his incredible athletic ability to lead this team to glory? Will Dirty Dollaz show out in support of Sacarmel? Only time will tell.