It is thought that the name “Black Friday” originated from stores that were in “the red” all year (losing money) would discount prices and go into “the black” (make a profit) after shopping after Thanksgiving and anteriorly to Christmas. Whoever told you this must not be an Oratory gentleman, because an OP man would not spread falsehoods as you would salt on an icy driveway. Only someone who has not received the collegiate level academic learning that this association of bright minds provides would say something so obscene. In fact, if anyone told you about this farce of a story about Black Friday, just end the friendship. Just cut it off right there. Here is the real story.

Picture this. It’s the early 1950s in Philadelphia and at this point in time, America is the place to be. The economy is booming, America is prosperous, you can buy anything you want for just about a nickel, and everything seems just doggone alright. You decide to go Christmas shopping the day after Thanksgiving right before the upcoming Army-Navy game. So, you hop into your Studebaker two-door and off you go.

When you arrive at the shopping center, you realize that everyone in the whole state had the same idea as you. These people were so omnipresent, that seeing the asphalt in which you were walking upon was a rarity. “Well,” you think to yourself, “I better not risk life and limb for a couple of Christmas presents.” So, you decide to stay outside and watch distantly. The closer you looked, this sunny day in paradise seemed like a warzone out of a John Wayne film.

Jeepers! It’s seeming more and more like a great idea by the minute to stay out of the edifice. People are now running around like crazies, others are shoplifting, and it is an all-around gosh darn bad experience. Gee wilikers, that’s a darn shame. You do what any lad with some degree of smarts would do, you hopped in your jalopy and booked towards the exit. “Boogity, boogity, boogity,” you thought to yourself, “let’s keep the shiny side up and the rubber side down.” Well, congratulations. You just witnessed the first black Friday firsthand. You can open your eyes now.

To put it long story short, in the early 50s the day after Thanksgiving and before an Army-Navy game, people got out of hand while they were shopping. People flooded all of the stores and started shoplifting and causing chaos. Thus, it was dubbed Black Friday by Philly’s Finest (History.com).

In the present day, Black Friday can be agonizing for many Oratory gentlemen if they find themselves in a Coleman six-person at 3 am waiting for the doors of Walmart to unfasten. This is a suboptimal scenario that I have promised myself I will never find myself in, hopefully. Now, with the recent creation of the World Wide Web, men, women, children, anyone really, can access black Friday shopping as long as they have an internet connection and the can-do spirit.